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The Essays of Montaigne - The Dangerous Art of Going Too Far

Michel de Montaigne

The Essays of Montaigne

The Dangerous Art of Going Too Far

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Summary

Montaigne tackles one of life's trickiest balancing acts: how even our best qualities can destroy us when we push them too far. He argues that we can literally love virtue so much that it stops being virtuous—like the archer who shoots past the target or the devoted person whose extreme piety makes others uncomfortable. Through vivid examples from history and his own observations, he shows how excess corrupts everything it touches, even marriage and devotion to God. A mother who helps execute her own son for honor, a king so religious he seems unfit to rule, husbands who treat their wives with such passion it becomes destructive—all demonstrate how good intentions can spiral into harm. Montaigne particularly focuses on how this applies to intimate relationships, arguing that even marital love needs boundaries and restraint to remain healthy. He observes that human nature seems designed to make us miserable: we have so few pure pleasures, yet we create rules and restrictions that make us even more wretched. The essay reveals Montaigne's core belief that wisdom lies not in passionate extremes but in finding the middle path—a skill that requires constant vigilance because our natural tendency is to push everything too far. This chapter matters because it teaches us to recognize when our strengths are becoming weaknesses, when our devotion is becoming obsession, and when our good intentions are causing harm.

Coming Up in Chapter 30

Next, Montaigne turns his attention to one of history's most misunderstood peoples, challenging everything his contemporaries believe about civilization and savagery. His encounter with Brazilian cannibals will force him—and us—to question who the real barbarians are.

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An excerpt from the original text.(complete · 2727 words)

OF MODERATION

As if we had an infectious touch, we, by our manner of handling, corrupt
things that in themselves are laudable and good: we may grasp virtue so
that it becomes vicious, if we embrace it too stringently and with too
violent a desire. Those who say, there is never any excess in virtue,
forasmuch as it is not virtue when it once becomes excess, only play upon
words:

“Insani sapiens nomen ferat, aequus iniqui,
Ultra quam satis est, virtutem si petat ipsam.”

[“Let the wise man bear the name of a madman, the just one of an
unjust, if he seek wisdom more than is sufficient.”
--Horace, Ep., i. 6, 15.]

[“The wise man is no longer wise, the just man no longer just, if he
seek to carry his love for wisdom or virtue beyond that which is
necessary.”]

This is a subtle consideration of philosophy. A man may both be too much
in love with virtue, and be excessive in a just action. Holy Writ agrees
with this, Be not wiser than you should, but be soberly wise.--[St.
Paul, Epistle to the Romans, xii. 3.]--I have known a great man,

--[“It is likely that Montaigne meant Henry III., king of France.
The Cardinal d’Ossat, writing to Louise, the queen-dowager, told
her, in his frank manner, that he had lived as much or more like a
monk than a monarch (Letter XXIII.) And Pope Sextus V., speaking of
that prince one day to the Cardinal de Joyeuse, protector of the
affairs of France, said to him pleasantly, ‘There is nothing that
your king hath not done, and does not do so still, to be a monk, nor
anything that I have not done, not to be a monk.’”--Coste.]

prejudice the opinion men had of his devotion, by pretending to be devout
beyond all examples of others of his condition. I love temperate and
moderate natures. An immoderate zeal, even to that which is good, even
though it does not offend, astonishes me, and puts me to study what name
to give it. Neither the mother of Pausanias,

--[“Montaigne would here give us to understand, upon the authority of
Diodorus Siculus, that Pausanias’ mother gave the first hint of the
punishment that was to be inflicted on her son. ‘Pausanias,’ says
this historian, ‘perceiving that the ephori, and some other
Lacedoemonians, aimed at apprehending him, got the start of them,
and went and took sanctuary m Minerva’s temple: and the
Lacedaemonians, being doubtful whether they ought to take him from
thence in violation of the franchise there, it is said that his own
mother came herself to the temple but spoke nothing nor did anything
more than lay a piece of brick, which she brought with her, on the
threshold of the temple, which, when she had done, she returned
home. The Lacedaemonians, taking the hint from the mother, caused
the gate of the temple to be walled up, and by this means starved
Pausanias, so that he died with hunger, &c. (lib. xi. cap. 10., of
Amyot’s translation)
. The name of Pausanias’ mother was Alcithea,
as we are informed by Thucydides’ scholiast, who only says that it
was reported, that when they set about walling up the gates of the
chapel in which Pausanias had taken refuge, his mother Alcithea laid
the first stone.”--Coste.]

who was the first instructor of her son’s process, and threw the first
stone towards his death, nor Posthumius the dictator, who put his son to
death, whom the ardour of youth had successfully pushed upon the enemy a
little more advanced than the rest of his squadron, do appear to me so
much just as strange; and I should neither advise nor like to follow so
savage a virtue, and that costs so dear.

--[“Opinions differ as to the truth of this fact. Livy thinks he
has good authority for rejecting it because it does not appear in
history that Posthumious was branded with it, as Titus Manlius was,
about 100 years after his time; for Manlius, having put his son to
death for the like cause, obtained the odious name of Imperiosus,
and since that time Manliana imperia has been used as a term to
signify orders that are too severe; Manliana Imperia, says Livy,
were not only horrible for the time present, but of a bad example to
posterity. And this historian makes no doubt but such commands
would have been actually styled Posthumiana Imperia, if Posthumius
had been the first who set so barbarous an example (Livy, lib. iv.
cap. 29, and lib. viii. cap. 7)
. But, however, Montaigne has Valer.
Maximus on his side, who says expressly, that Posthumius caused his
son to be put to death, and Diodorus of Sicily (lib. xii. cap.
19)
.”--Coste.]

The archer that shoots over, misses as much as he that falls short, and
‘tis equally troublesome to my sight, to look up at a great light, and
to look down into a dark abyss. Callicles in Plato says, that the
extremity of philosophy is hurtful, and advises not to dive into it
beyond the limits of profit; that, taken moderately, it is pleasant and
useful; but that in the end it renders a man brutish and vicious, a
contemner of religion and the common laws, an enemy to civil
conversation, and all human pleasures, incapable of all public
administration, unfit either to assist others or to relieve himself, and
a fit object for all sorts of injuries and affronts. He says true; for
in its excess, it enslaves our natural freedom, and by an impertinent
subtlety, leads us out of the fair and beaten way that nature has traced
for us.

The love we bear to our wives is very lawful, and yet theology thinks fit
to curb and restrain it. As I remember, I have read in one place of St.
Thomas Aquinas,--[Secunda Secundx, Quaest. 154, art. 9.]--where he
condemns marriages within any of the forbidden degrees, for this reason,
amongst others, that there is some danger, lest the friendship a man
bears to such a woman, should be immoderate; for if the conjugal
affection be full and perfect betwixt them, as it ought to be, and that
it be over and above surcharged with that of kindred too, there is no
doubt, but such an addition will carry the husband beyond the bounds of
reason.

Those sciences that regulate the manners of men, divinity and philosophy,
will have their say in everything; there is no action so private and
secret that can escape their inspection and jurisdiction. They are best
taught who are best able to control and curb their own liberty; women
expose their nudities as much as you will upon the account of pleasure,
though in the necessities of physic they are altogether as shy. I will,
therefore, in their behalf:

--[Coste translates this: “on the part of philosophy and theology,”
observing that but few wives would think themselves obliged to
Montaigne for any such lesson to their husbands.]--

teach the husbands, that is, such as are too vehement in the exercise of
the matrimonial duty--if such there still be--this lesson, that the very
pleasures they enjoy in the society of their wives are reproachable if
immoderate, and that a licentious and riotous abuse of them is a fault as
reprovable here as in illicit connections. Those immodest and debauched
tricks and postures, that the first ardour suggests to us in this affair,
are not only indecently but detrimentally practised upon our wives. Let
them at least learn impudence from another hand; they are ever ready
enough for our business, and I for my part always went the plain way to
work.

Marriage is a solemn and religious tie, and therefore the pleasure we
extract from it should be a sober and serious delight, and mixed with a
certain kind of gravity; it should be a sort of discreet and
conscientious pleasure. And seeing that the chief end of it is
generation, some make a question, whether when men are out of hopes as
when they are superannuated or already with child, it be lawful to
embrace our wives. ‘Tis homicide, according to Plato.--[Laws, 8.]--
Certain nations (the Mohammedan, amongst others) abominate all conjunction
with women with child, others also, with those who are in their courses.
Zenobia would never admit her husband for more than one encounter, after
which she left him to his own swing for the whole time of her conception,
and not till after that would again receive him:--[Trebellius Pollio,
Triginta Tyran., c. 30.]--a brave and generous example of conjugal
continence. It was doubtless from some lascivious poet,--[The lascivious
poet is Homer; see his Iliad, xiv. 294.]--and one that himself was in
great distress for a little of this sport, that Plato borrowed this
story; that Jupiter was one day so hot upon his wife, that not having so
much patience as till she could get to the couch, he threw her upon the
floor, where the vehemence of pleasure made him forget the great and
important resolutions he had but newly taken with the rest of the gods in
his celestial council, and to brag that he had had as good a bout, as
when he got her maidenhead, unknown to their parents.

The kings of Persia were wont to invite their wives to the beginning of
their festivals; but when the wine began to work in good earnest, and
that they were to give the reins to pleasure, they sent them back to
their private apartments, that they might not participate in their
immoderate lust, sending for other women in their stead, with whom they
were not obliged to so great a decorum of respect.--[Plutarch, Precepts
of Marriage, c. 14.]--All pleasures and all sorts of gratifications
are not properly and fitly conferred upon all sorts of persons.
Epaminondas had committed to prison a young man for certain debauches;
for whom Pelopidas mediated, that at his request he might be set at
liberty, which Epaminondas denied to him, but granted it at the first
word to a wench of his, that made the same intercession; saying, that it
was a gratification fit for such a one as she, but not for a captain.
Sophocles being joint praetor with Pericles, seeing accidentally a fine
boy pass by: “O what a charming boy is that!” said he. “That might be
very well,” answered Pericles, “for any other than a praetor, who ought
not only to have his hands, but his eyes, too, chaste.”--[Cicero, De
Offic., i. 40.] AElius Verus, the emperor, answered his wife, who
reproached him with his love to other women, that he did it upon a
conscientious account, forasmuch as marriage was a name of honour and
dignity, not of wanton and lascivious desire; and our ecclesiastical
history preserves the memory of that woman in great veneration, who
parted from her husband because she would not comply with his indecent
and inordinate desires. In fine, there is no pleasure so just and
lawful, where intemperance and excess are not to be condemned.

But, to speak the truth, is not man a most miserable creature the while?
It is scarce, by his natural condition, in his power to taste one
pleasure pure and entire; and yet must he be contriving doctrines and
precepts to curtail that little he has; he is not yet wretched enough,
unless by art and study he augment his own misery:

“Fortunae miseras auximus arte vias.”

[“We artificially augment the wretchedness of fortune.”
--Properitius, lib. iii. 7, 44.]

Human wisdom makes as ill use of her talent, when she exercises it in
rescinding from the number and sweetness of those pleasures that are
naturally our due, as she employs it favourably and well in artificially
disguising and tricking out the ills of life, to alleviate the sense of
them. Had I ruled the roast, I should have taken another and more
natural course, which, to say the truth, is both commodious and holy, and
should, peradventure, have been able to have limited it too;
notwithstanding that both our spiritual and corporal physicians, as by
compact betwixt themselves, can find no other way to cure, nor other
remedy for the infirmities of the body and the soul, than by misery and
pain. To this end, watchings, fastings, hair-shirts, remote and solitary
banishments, perpetual imprisonments, whips and other afflictions, have
been introduced amongst men: but so, that they should carry a sting with
them, and be real afflictions indeed; and not fall out as it once did to
one Gallio, who having been sent an exile into the isle of Lesbos, news
was not long after brought to Rome, that he there lived as merry as the
day was long; and that what had been enjoined him for a penance, turned
to his pleasure and satisfaction: whereupon the Senate thought fit to
recall him home to his wife and family, and confine him to his own house,
to accommodate their punishment to his feeling and apprehension. For to
him whom fasting would make more healthful and more sprightly, and to him
to whose palate fish were more acceptable than flesh, the prescription of
these would have no curative effect; no more than in the other sort of
physic, where drugs have no effect upon him who swallows them with
appetite and pleasure: the bitterness of the potion and the abhorrence of
the patient are necessary circumstances to the operation. The nature
that would eat rhubarb like buttered turnips, would frustrate the use and
virtue of it; it must be something to trouble and disturb the stomach,
that must purge and cure it; and here the common rule, that things are
cured by their contraries, fails; for in this one ill is cured by
another.

This belief a little resembles that other so ancient one, of thinking to
gratify the gods and nature by massacre and murder: an opinion
universally once received in all religions. And still, in these later
times wherein our fathers lived, Amurath at the taking of the Isthmus,
immolated six hundred young Greeks to his father’s soul, in the nature of
a propitiatory sacrifice for his sins. And in those new countries
discovered in this age of ours, which are pure and virgin yet, in
comparison of ours, this practice is in some measure everywhere received:
all their idols reek with human blood, not without various examples of
horrid cruelty: some they burn alive, and take, half broiled, off the
coals to tear out their hearts and entrails; some, even women, they flay
alive, and with their bloody skins clothe and disguise others. Neither
are we without great examples of constancy and resolution in this affair
the poor souls that are to be sacrificed, old men, women, and children,
themselves going about some days before to beg alms for the offering of
their sacrifice, presenting themselves to the slaughter, singing and
dancing with the spectators.

The ambassadors of the king of Mexico, setting out to Fernando Cortez the
power and greatness of their master, after having told him, that he had
thirty vassals, of whom each was able to raise an hundred thousand
fighting men, and that he kept his court in the fairest and best
fortified city under the sun, added at last, that he was obliged yearly
to offer to the gods fifty thousand men. And it is affirmed, that he
maintained a continual war, with some potent neighbouring nations, not
only to keep the young men in exercise, but principally to have
wherewithal to furnish his sacrifices with his prisoners of war. At a
certain town in another place, for the welcome of the said Cortez, they
sacrificed fifty men at once. I will tell you this one tale more, and I
have done; some of these people being beaten by him, sent to acknowledge
him, and to treat with him of a peace, whose messengers carried him three
sorts of gifts, which they presented in these terms: “Behold, lord, here
are five slaves: if thou art a furious god that feedeth upon flesh and
blood, eat these, and we will bring thee more; if thou art an affable
god, behold here incense and feathers; but if thou art a man, take these
fowls and these fruits that we have brought thee.”

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Let's Analyse the Pattern

Pattern: The Virtue Trap
THE PATTERN: Our greatest strengths become our greatest weaknesses when we push them past their natural limits. Montaigne reveals how virtue itself can corrupt us—not through evil, but through excess. The devoted parent who smothers their child, the honest person who becomes brutally tactless, the hard worker who burns out their family relationships. We destroy what we're trying to protect by loving it too much. THE MECHANISM: This happens because we mistake intensity for virtue. When something feels good and right, we assume more must be better. A mother's protective instinct serves her child well—until it becomes helicopter parenting that cripples their independence. Religious devotion brings peace—until it becomes rigid judgment that pushes others away. We get addicted to the feeling of being 'right' and keep escalating until we've crossed into harmful territory. THE MODERN PARALLEL: Watch this pattern everywhere. The manager who micromanages because they 'care about quality' until their team quits. The parent who helps with homework so much their kid never learns to struggle. The friend who's so honest they destroy relationships with brutal 'truth-telling.' The nurse who works extra shifts to help patients until she's too exhausted to provide good care. The partner who's so devoted they become possessive and controlling. THE NAVIGATION: Learn to recognize your own virtue signals—those moments when you feel most righteous about your behavior. That's when you're most dangerous. Ask yourself: 'Is this helping or am I just feeding my own sense of being good?' Set boundaries on your best qualities. Schedule rest from your strengths. When people start pulling away from your 'virtue,' that's your warning sign. The goal isn't to be less good—it's to be good in sustainable, effective ways. When you can name the pattern, predict where it leads, and navigate it successfully—that's amplified intelligence.

Our greatest strengths become destructive when we push them beyond their natural limits, mistaking intensity for righteousness.

Why This Matters

Connect literature to life

Skill: Recognizing When Good Intentions Go Bad

This chapter teaches us to spot the moment when our virtues tip into vices, when our care becomes control, when our help becomes harm.

Practice This Today

This week, notice when people start pulling away from your 'help'—that's your signal to dial back your good intentions and check if you're serving them or serving your own need to be needed.

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Now let's explore the literary elements.

Key Quotes & Analysis

"We may grasp virtue so that it becomes vicious, if we embrace it too stringently and with too violent a desire."

— Montaigne

Context: Opening argument about how good things can become bad through excess

This captures Montaigne's central insight—that the way we pursue something matters as much as what we pursue. Even virtue can corrupt us if we become obsessed with it.

In Today's Words:

You can be so determined to do the right thing that you end up doing the wrong thing.

"Be not wiser than you should, but be soberly wise."

— St. Paul (quoted by Montaigne)

Context: Biblical support for the argument against excess

Montaigne uses religious authority to show that even Christianity warns against taking virtue too far. 'Soberly wise' suggests wisdom with restraint and humility.

In Today's Words:

Don't be a know-it-all—be smart, but stay humble and practical about it.

"There is never any excess in virtue, forasmuch as it is not virtue when it once becomes excess."

— Philosophers (quoted by Montaigne)

Context: An opposing viewpoint that Montaigne critiques

Montaigne calls this 'playing upon words'—a clever but unhelpful distinction. He argues that real virtue must account for practical consequences, not just theoretical purity.

In Today's Words:

Some people say you can't have too much of a good thing, but that's just word games—too much of anything stops being good.

Thematic Threads

Balance

In This Chapter

Montaigne argues that even virtue requires moderation—that excess corrupts everything it touches, including our best qualities

Development

Introduced here as core philosophy

In Your Life:

You might recognize this when your helpfulness becomes enabling or your honesty becomes cruelty

Self-awareness

In This Chapter

The essay demands we examine our motivations when we feel most righteous about our behavior

Development

Building on earlier themes of honest self-examination

In Your Life:

You see this when you're convinced you're helping but people keep pulling away from you

Human Nature

In This Chapter

Montaigne observes we're naturally inclined to push good things too far, making ourselves miserable through excess

Development

Deepening his exploration of why humans create their own suffering

In Your Life:

You experience this when you can't stop yourself from overdoing things that initially brought joy

Relationships

In This Chapter

He specifically examines how excessive love and devotion can destroy marriages and family bonds

Development

Expanding relationship wisdom beyond earlier chapters

In Your Life:

You might see this in relationships where too much attention or care starts feeling suffocating

Wisdom

In This Chapter

True wisdom lies in recognizing when enough is enough, even with good things

Development

Crystallizing practical wisdom themes from throughout the essays

In Your Life:

You develop this by learning to stop before you cross the line from helpful to harmful

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You now have the context. Time to form your own thoughts.

Discussion Questions

  1. 1

    What examples does Montaigne give of people whose virtues became destructive when taken too far?

    analysis • surface
  2. 2

    Why does Montaigne think we naturally push good things past their healthy limits?

    analysis • medium
  3. 3

    Where do you see this pattern in modern life - people whose strengths become weaknesses through excess?

    application • medium
  4. 4

    How can someone recognize when their own best qualities are starting to cause harm?

    application • deep
  5. 5

    What does this chapter reveal about the relationship between good intentions and actual results?

    reflection • deep

Critical Thinking Exercise

10 minutes

Audit Your Virtue Signals

Think of three qualities you're most proud of - maybe you're helpful, honest, hardworking, or protective. For each quality, write down one way it has ever backfired or caused problems. Then identify one early warning sign that tells you when you're pushing that strength too far.

Consider:

  • •Focus on times when people pulled away from your 'help' or seemed uncomfortable with your virtue
  • •Look for patterns where your good intentions created the opposite of what you wanted
  • •Notice when you feel most righteous or justified - that's often when you're most dangerous

Journaling Prompt

Write about a time when one of your best qualities caused problems in a relationship. What would you do differently now that you understand Montaigne's warning about virtuous excess?

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Coming Up Next...

Chapter 30: Questioning Our Own Barbarism

Next, Montaigne turns his attention to one of history's most misunderstood peoples, challenging everything his contemporaries believe about civilization and savagery. His encounter with Brazilian cannibals will force him—and us—to question who the real barbarians are.

Continue to Chapter 30
Previous
Love Letters from a Lost Friend
Contents
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Questioning Our Own Barbarism

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