Summary
Anna and Vronsky's relationship reaches a breaking point as they struggle with the suffocating reality of their situation. Living together but unable to marry due to Anna's husband's refusal to grant a divorce, they find themselves trapped in a social limbo that's eating away at both of them. Anna becomes increasingly paranoid and jealous, convinced that Vronsky is losing interest in her, while Vronsky feels frustrated by the limitations their relationship places on his life and career. Their conversation reveals how isolation has poisoned what once felt like passionate love. Anna's emotional state becomes more volatile - she swings between desperate clinging and angry accusations. The chapter shows how societal constraints can destroy even the most intense relationships when there's no legitimate path forward. What started as a grand romantic rebellion against convention has become a prison of mutual resentment. Anna's growing instability isn't just about jealousy - it's about a woman who sacrificed everything for love and now watches that love crumble under the weight of social impossibility. Vronsky, meanwhile, begins to see the true cost of their affair, not just to his reputation but to his sense of purpose and direction. The chapter captures that terrible moment in a relationship when both people realize they're hurting each other but can't find a way to stop. It's a masterful portrayal of how external pressures can turn love toxic, and how people can become trapped by choices that once felt liberating.
Coming Up in Chapter 37
Anna's emotional spiral deepens as she grapples with the impossible choice between holding onto Vronsky and facing the reality of their doomed situation. Meanwhile, Vronsky must decide whether their love is worth the continued sacrifice of everything else in his life.
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An excerpt from the original text.(~500 words)
Soon after the doctor, Dolly had arrived. She knew that there was to be a consultation that day, and though she was only just up after her confinement (she had another baby, a little girl, born at the end of the winter), though she had trouble and anxiety enough of her own, she had left her tiny baby and a sick child, to come and hear Kitty’s fate, which was to be decided that day. “Well, well?” she said, coming into the drawing-room, without taking off her hat. “You’re all in good spirits. Good news, then?” They tried to tell her what the doctor had said, but it appeared that though the doctor had talked distinctly enough and at great length, it was utterly impossible to report what he had said. The only point of interest was that it was settled they should go abroad. Dolly could not help sighing. Her dearest friend, her sister, was going away. And her life was not a cheerful one. Her relations with Stepan Arkadyevitch after their reconciliation had become humiliating. The union Anna had cemented turned out to be of no solid character, and family harmony was breaking down again at the same point. There had been nothing definite, but Stepan Arkadyevitch was hardly ever at home; money, too, was hardly ever forthcoming, and Dolly was continually tortured by suspicions of infidelity, which she tried to dismiss, dreading the agonies of jealousy she had been through already. The first onslaught of jealousy, once lived through, could never come back again, and even the discovery of infidelities could never now affect her as it had the first time. Such a discovery now would only mean breaking up family habits, and she let herself be deceived, despising him and still more herself, for the weakness. Besides this, the care of her large family was a constant worry to her: first, the nursing of her young baby did not go well, then the nurse had gone away, now one of the children had fallen ill. “Well, how are all of you?” asked her mother. “Ah, mamma, we have plenty of troubles of our own. Lili is ill, and I’m afraid it’s scarlatina. I have come here now to hear about Kitty, and then I shall shut myself up entirely, if—God forbid—it should be scarlatina.” The old prince too had come in from his study after the doctor’s departure, and after presenting his cheek to Dolly, and saying a few words to her, he turned to his wife: “How have you settled it? you’re going? Well, and what do you mean to do with me?” “I suppose you had better stay here, Alexander,” said his wife. “That’s as you like.” “Mamma, why shouldn’t father come with us?” said Kitty. “It would be nicer for him and for us too.” The old prince got up and stroked Kitty’s hair. She lifted her head and looked at him with a forced smile. It always seemed to her that he...
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Intelligence Amplifier™ Analysis
The Road of Mutual Destruction - When Love Becomes a Prison
When external barriers block a relationship's natural progression, partners turn their frustration on each other instead of the real obstacle.
Why This Matters
Connect literature to life
This chapter teaches how to identify when you're fighting about the wrong thing because the real problem feels too big to tackle.
Practice This Today
This week, notice when arguments escalate over small things—ask yourself what larger constraint or frustration might be the real culprit.
Now let's explore the literary elements.
Terms to Know
Social ostracism
Being deliberately excluded from society and social circles as punishment for breaking social rules. In 19th-century Russia, this was devastating because your social position determined everything from where you could live to who would associate with you.
Modern Usage:
We see this in cancel culture, workplace blacklisting, or when someone gets cut out of their friend group for crossing a line.
Divorce scandal
In Tolstoy's time, divorce was nearly impossible and socially ruinous, especially for women. A woman who left her husband lost her children, her social standing, and often her financial security forever.
Modern Usage:
Today we see similar dynamics in custody battles, community judgment around divorce, or when someone's reputation gets destroyed by relationship drama.
Psychological deterioration
The gradual breakdown of someone's mental state under extreme stress. Tolstoy was masterful at showing how isolation and impossible situations can make people paranoid, jealous, and self-destructive.
Modern Usage:
This happens in toxic relationships, during prolonged unemployment, or when someone feels trapped with no way out of their situation.
Mutual resentment
When two people in a relationship start blaming each other for their problems, creating a cycle where each person's anger feeds the other's. Neither can break the pattern because both feel victimized.
Modern Usage:
Common in marriages where both spouses feel sacrificed, work partnerships gone bad, or friendships where both people feel they give more than they get.
Social limbo
Being stuck between two worlds - not accepted in respectable society but not free to start fresh either. Anna and Vronsky can't marry but can't separate, leaving them in permanent uncertainty.
Modern Usage:
Like being in a long-term relationship that's going nowhere, stuck in a job you hate but can't leave, or living situation you can't change.
Passionate rebellion
Making dramatic choices based on intense feelings rather than practical considerations. What feels like brave independence at first often becomes a trap when reality sets in.
Modern Usage:
Quitting your job without a plan, moving across the country for someone you barely know, or burning bridges in a moment of anger.
Characters in This Chapter
Anna Karenina
Tragic protagonist
Shows extreme emotional volatility in this chapter, swinging between desperate clinging to Vronsky and angry accusations. Her paranoia and jealousy reveal how isolation has poisoned her mind and made her increasingly unstable.
Modern Equivalent:
The woman who gave up everything for a relationship and now can't stop checking his phone
Count Vronsky
Conflicted lover
Feels trapped by the limitations their relationship places on his life and career. He's beginning to see the true cost of their affair and feels frustrated by the dead-end nature of their situation.
Modern Equivalent:
The guy who realizes his midlife crisis affair has become a prison
Alexei Karenin
Absent obstacle
Though not physically present in this chapter, his refusal to grant Anna a divorce is the force that traps both Anna and Vronsky in their impossible situation. His power over their lives drives the conflict.
Modern Equivalent:
The ex who won't sign the divorce papers and keeps everyone in legal limbo
Key Quotes & Analysis
"You don't love me. You love someone else."
Context: Anna's paranoid accusation during their increasingly toxic argument
This shows how Anna's isolation has made her paranoid and desperate. She's projecting her fears onto Vronsky because she can feel their relationship dying but can't admit the real reasons why.
In Today's Words:
You're cheating on me, aren't you?
"What did I sacrifice everything for, if not for you?"
Context: Anna reminding Vronsky of what she gave up when their argument escalates
Anna is using her sacrifice as emotional leverage, which shows how their relationship has become transactional. She's keeping score of what she lost, which poisons any remaining love.
In Today's Words:
I gave up everything for you, so you owe me.
"I cannot go on living like this."
Context: Vronsky's frustrated response to their impossible situation
This reveals that Vronsky is reaching his breaking point. He's realizing that passion alone isn't enough to sustain a relationship when there's no legitimate future possible.
In Today's Words:
This isn't working anymore and we both know it.
"We torture each other, and torture ourselves."
Context: A moment of clarity about their destructive dynamic
Anna briefly sees their relationship clearly - they're both victims and perpetrators in a cycle of mutual destruction. It's one of her few moments of honest self-awareness.
In Today's Words:
We're toxic for each other and we know it.
Thematic Threads
Social Expectations
In This Chapter
Society's refusal to accept Anna and Vronsky's relationship traps them in limbo, unable to marry or be fully accepted
Development
Evolved from earlier defiance to crushing reality - social rules aren't just inconvenient, they're destructive
In Your Life:
You might feel this when your relationship doesn't fit others' expectations and you start doubting it yourself.
Identity
In This Chapter
Both Anna and Vronsky are losing sense of who they are - she's neither wife nor single, he's neither bachelor nor married man
Development
Deepened from earlier chapters where identity crisis was emerging - now it's consuming them
In Your Life:
You might experience this when major life changes leave you feeling like you don't fit anywhere.
Human Relationships
In This Chapter
Love becomes a source of mutual torture as external pressures turn partners against each other
Development
Transformed from passionate connection to destructive cycle - shows how relationships evolve under pressure
In Your Life:
You might see this when stress makes you fight with the people you're closest to instead of addressing the real problem.
Personal Growth
In This Chapter
Both characters are regressing instead of growing - becoming more paranoid, resentful, and trapped in destructive patterns
Development
Reversed from earlier growth - shows how impossible situations can stunt development
In Your Life:
You might notice this when you're stuck in circumstances that prevent you from moving forward in life.
You now have the context. Time to form your own thoughts.
Discussion Questions
- 1
What specific behaviors show that Anna and Vronsky's relationship is deteriorating? What are they fighting about versus what's really bothering them?
analysis • surface - 2
Why does their isolation make their problems worse instead of bringing them closer together? How does having no legitimate future path poison their present?
analysis • medium - 3
Where do you see this same pattern today - couples, coworkers, or family members turning on each other when they're really frustrated by external circumstances they can't control?
application • medium - 4
When you're in a situation where external constraints are creating relationship tension, what specific steps could you take to address the real problem instead of attacking each other?
application • deep - 5
What does this chapter reveal about how social pressure affects our most intimate relationships? When is love not enough to overcome systemic barriers?
reflection • deep
Critical Thinking Exercise
Name the Real Enemy
Think of a current conflict in your life - with a partner, family member, coworker, or friend. Write down what you usually argue about, then dig deeper to identify the external constraint or pressure that's actually driving the tension. Map out how that outside force is affecting both people involved.
Consider:
- •Look for systemic issues like money, workplace policies, family expectations, or social pressures rather than personality conflicts
- •Consider how both people might be feeling trapped or frustrated by the same external circumstances
- •Notice if you're blaming each other for problems neither of you actually created
Journaling Prompt
Write about a time when you realized you were fighting with someone about the wrong thing. What was the real issue, and how did naming it change your approach to the relationship?
Coming Up Next...
Chapter 37
The coming pages reveal key events and character development in this chapter, and teach us thematic elements and literary techniques. These discoveries help us navigate similar situations in our own lives.