Anna Karenina

oing out of the nursery and being again alone, Levin went back at once
to the thought, in which there was something not clear.

Instead of going into the drawing-room, where he heard voices, he
stopped on the terrace, and leaning his elbows on the parapet, he gazed
up at the sky.

It was quite dark now, and in the south, where he was looking, there
were no clouds. The storm had drifted on to the opposite side of the
sky, and there were flashes of lightning and distant thunder from that
quarter. Levin listened to the monotonous drip from the lime trees in
the garden, and looked at the triangle of stars he knew so well, and
the Milky Way with its branches that ran through its midst. At each
flash of lightning the Milky Way, and even the bright stars, vanished,
but as soon as the lightning died away, they reappeared in their places
as though some hand had flung them back with careful aim.

“Well, what is it perplexes me?” Levin said to himself, feeling
beforehand that the solution of his difficulties was ready in his soul,
though he did not know it yet. “Yes, the one unmistakable,
incontestable manifestation of the Divinity is the law of right and
wrong, which has come into the world by revelation, and which I feel in
myself, and in the recognition of which—I don’t make myself, but
whether I will or not—I am made one with other men in one body of
believers, which is called the church. Well, but the Jews, the
Mohammedans, the Confucians, the Buddhists—what of them?” he put to
himself the question he had feared to face. “Can these hundreds of
millions of men be deprived of that highest blessing without which life
has no meaning?” He pondered a moment, but immediately corrected
himself. “But what am I questioning?” he said to himself. “I am
questioning the relation to Divinity of all the different religions of
all mankind. I am questioning the universal manifestation of God to all
the world with all those misty blurs. What am I about? To me
individually, to my heart has been revealed a knowledge beyond all
doubt, and unattainable by reason, and here I am obstinately trying to
express that knowledge in reason and words.

“Don’t I know that the stars don’t move?” he asked himself, gazing at
the bright planet which had shifted its position up to the topmost twig
of the birch-tree. “But looking at the movements of the stars, I can’t
picture to myself the rotation of the earth, and I’m right in saying
that the stars move.

“And could the astronomers have understood and calculated anything, if
they had taken into account all the complicated and varied motions of
the earth? All the marvelous conclusions they have reached about the
distances, weights, movements, and deflections of the heavenly bodies
are only founded on the apparent motions of the heavenly bodies about a
stationary earth, on that very motion I see before me now, which has
been so for millions of men during long ages, and was and will be
always alike, and can always be trusted. And just as the conclusions of
the astronomers would have been vain and uncertain if not founded on
observations of the seen heavens, in relation to a single meridian and
a single horizon, so would my conclusions be vain and uncertain if not
founded on that conception of right, which has been and will be always
alike for all men, which has been revealed to me as a Christian, and
which can always be trusted in my soul. The question of other religions
and their relations to Divinity I have no right to decide, and no
possibility of deciding.”

“Oh, you haven’t gone in then?” he heard Kitty’s voice all at once, as
she came by the same way to the drawing-room.

“What is it? you’re not worried about anything?” she said, looking
intently at his face in the starlight.

But she could not have seen his face if a flash of lightning had not
hidden the stars and revealed it. In that flash she saw his face
distinctly, and seeing him calm and happy, she smiled at him.

“She understands,” he thought; “she knows what I’m thinking about.
Shall I tell her or not? Yes, I’ll tell her.” But at the moment he was
about to speak, she began speaking.

“Kostya! do something for me,” she said; “go into the corner room and
see if they’ve made it all right for Sergey Ivanovitch. I can’t very
well. See if they’ve put the new wash stand in it.”

“Very well, I’ll go directly,” said Levin, standing up and kissing her.

“No, I’d better not speak of it,” he thought, when she had gone in
before him. “It is a secret for me alone, of vital importance for me,
and not to be put into words.

“This new feeling has not changed me, has not made me happy and
enlightened all of a sudden, as I had dreamed, just like the feeling
for my child. There was no surprise in this either. Faith—or not
faith—I don’t know what it is—but this feeling has come just as
imperceptibly through suffering, and has taken firm root in my soul.

“I shall go on in the same way, losing my temper with Ivan the
coachman, falling into angry discussions, expressing my opinions
tactlessly; there will be still the same wall between the holy of
holies of my soul and other people, even my wife; I shall still go on
scolding her for my own terror, and being remorseful for it; I shall
still be as unable to understand with my reason why I pray, and I shall
still go on praying; but my life now, my whole life apart from anything
that can happen to me, every minute of it is no more meaningless, as it
was before, but it has the positive meaning of goodness, which I have
the power to put into it.”

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