Summary
Princess Mary struggles with whether to see Rostóv when he visits, torn between propriety and her growing feelings. She overthinks every possible scenario, worried about appearing improper while in mourning or seeming rude after his kindness to her family. But when Rostóv actually arrives, something magical happens—all her anxiety vanishes. She becomes naturally graceful and radiant, speaking with new confidence and warmth. Even the calculating Mademoiselle Bourienne is amazed by Mary's sudden transformation. Rostóv sees Mary's inner beauty—her years of self-sacrifice, spiritual growth, and genuine goodness—shining through her face and manner. Their conversation flows easily despite being simple and unimportant. When Rostóv plays with her nephew, Mary watches with tender joy, and he notices her loving expression. Meanwhile, the governor's wife continues her matchmaking efforts, arranging another meeting and pressuring Rostóv to propose. Though Rostóv promised Sónya he wouldn't pursue anyone else, he feels swept along by forces beyond his control. He can't picture a future with Mary the way he could with other women, which both confuses and frightens him. This chapter shows how the right person can bring out our best self effortlessly, while also exploring the tension between following our heart and honoring our commitments.
Coming Up in Chapter 270
As the matchmaking pressure intensifies, Rostóv faces a crucial decision about his future. The governor's wife has arranged another meeting, but can he reconcile his promise to Sónya with the undeniable connection he feels to Princess Mary?
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An excerpt from the original text.(~500 words)
On reaching Moscow after her meeting with Rostóv, Princess Mary had found her nephew there with his tutor, and a letter from Prince Andrew giving her instructions how to get to her Aunt Malvíntseva at Vorónezh. That feeling akin to temptation which had tormented her during her father’s illness, since his death, and especially since her meeting with Rostóv was smothered by arrangements for the journey, anxiety about her brother, settling in a new house, meeting new people, and attending to her nephew’s education. She was sad. Now, after a month passed in quiet surroundings, she felt more and more deeply the loss of her father which was associated in her mind with the ruin of Russia. She was agitated and incessantly tortured by the thought of the dangers to which her brother, the only intimate person now remaining to her, was exposed. She was worried too about her nephew’s education for which she had always felt herself incompetent, but in the depths of her soul she felt at peace—a peace arising from consciousness of having stifled those personal dreams and hopes that had been on the point of awakening within her and were related to her meeting with Rostóv. The day after her party the governor’s wife came to see Malvíntseva and, after discussing her plan with the aunt, remarked that though under present circumstances a formal betrothal was, of course, not to be thought of, all the same the young people might be brought together and could get to know one another. Malvíntseva expressed approval, and the governor’s wife began to speak of Rostóv in Mary’s presence, praising him and telling how he had blushed when Princess Mary’s name was mentioned. But Princess Mary experienced a painful rather than a joyful feeling—her mental tranquillity was destroyed, and desires, doubts, self-reproach, and hopes reawoke. During the two days that elapsed before Rostóv called, Princess Mary continually thought of how she ought to behave to him. First she decided not to come to the drawing room when he called to see her aunt—that it would not be proper for her, in her deep mourning, to receive visitors; then she thought this would be rude after what he had done for her; then it occurred to her that her aunt and the governor’s wife had intentions concerning herself and Rostóv—their looks and words at times seemed to confirm this supposition—then she told herself that only she, with her sinful nature, could think this of them: they could not forget that situated as she was, while still wearing deep mourning, such matchmaking would be an insult to her and to her father’s memory. Assuming that she did go down to see him, Princess Mary imagined the words he would say to her and what she would say to him, and these words sometimes seemed undeservedly cold and then to mean too much. More than anything she feared lest the confusion she felt might overwhelm her and betray her as soon as she...
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Intelligence Amplifier™ Analysis
The Transformation Effect - When the Right Person Unlocks Your Best Self
The right people unlock our most natural, confident selves without effort, while wrong matches make us anxious and inauthentic.
Why This Matters
Connect literature to life
This chapter teaches how to identify relationships where you can be authentic versus those that trigger performance anxiety.
Practice This Today
This week, notice which people make you feel naturally confident and which make you second-guess every word—then spend more time with the first group.
Now let's explore the literary elements.
Terms to Know
Formal betrothal
An official engagement announcement with family approval and social recognition. In 19th-century Russia, this was a serious commitment that involved property negotiations and couldn't be broken easily. It was different from just dating or being interested in someone.
Modern Usage:
Today we might call this 'making it Facebook official' or meeting the parents - that moment when a relationship becomes publicly acknowledged and serious.
Mourning period
A prescribed time after someone's death when family members wore black, avoided social events, and followed strict rules about behavior. For Princess Mary, her father's recent death means she shouldn't be thinking about romance or appearing too happy in public.
Modern Usage:
We still have informal mourning periods where it feels wrong to date too soon after a breakup or loss, or when people judge you for 'moving on too fast.'
Matchmaking
The practice of older women arranging romantic meetings between suitable young people. The governor's wife is actively trying to bring Princess Mary and Rostov together, seeing it as her social duty to make good matches.
Modern Usage:
This is like friends setting you up on blind dates, or relatives constantly asking 'when are you going to settle down' and introducing you to their coworker's cousin.
Inner transformation
The way Princess Mary suddenly becomes beautiful and confident when Rostov arrives, even though she was anxious moments before. Tolstoy shows how the right person can bring out qualities we didn't know we had.
Modern Usage:
This is that feeling when you're with someone who makes you feel like your best self - funnier, smarter, more attractive than you usually feel.
Conflicted loyalty
Rostov's struggle between his promise to Sonya and his growing attraction to Princess Mary. He feels pulled in different directions by duty, family pressure, and his own heart.
Modern Usage:
This is like staying in a relationship because you've been together so long, even when you're attracted to someone else who might be a better match.
Characters in This Chapter
Princess Mary
Protagonist struggling with love
She transforms from anxious and self-doubting to naturally graceful and radiant when Rostov visits. Her inner beauty and years of self-sacrifice shine through, showing how the right person can reveal our best qualities.
Modern Equivalent:
The woman who thinks she's plain until she meets someone who sees her true worth
Rostov
Love interest torn between obligations
He's drawn to Princess Mary's genuine goodness but can't envision a future with her the way he could with others. He feels swept along by forces beyond his control while bound by his promise to Sonya.
Modern Equivalent:
The guy who knows he should want the 'good girl' but can't shake his feelings for his high school girlfriend
The governor's wife
Determined matchmaker
She actively arranges meetings between Mary and Rostov, pressuring him to propose and discussing marriage plans with Mary's aunt. She represents social forces pushing people toward 'suitable' matches.
Modern Equivalent:
The friend who's always trying to set people up and won't take no for an answer
Mademoiselle Bourienne
Calculating observer
She's amazed by Princess Mary's sudden transformation and beauty when Rostov arrives, having never seen this side of her before. Her surprise highlights how dramatically Mary changes.
Modern Equivalent:
The coworker who's shocked when the quiet girl suddenly glows up around a certain guy
Key Quotes & Analysis
"She felt at peace—a peace arising from consciousness of having stifled those personal dreams and hopes that had been on the point of awakening within her."
Context: Describing Princess Mary's state of mind before Rostov's visit
This shows how Mary has convinced herself she's content by suppressing her romantic feelings. The phrase 'stifled those personal dreams' reveals she's been denying her own desires for love and happiness.
In Today's Words:
She felt calm because she'd convinced herself to stop wanting things for herself.
"All her anxiety vanished and something magical happened—she became naturally graceful and radiant."
Context: When Rostov actually arrives after Mary's hours of worry
This captures the transformative power of being with someone who brings out our best self. All her overthinking disappears when faced with the actual situation, showing how anxiety often exists only in our imagination.
In Today's Words:
The moment he walked in, all her nerves disappeared and she just felt like herself—but better.
"He could not picture a future with Mary the way he could with other women, which both confused and frightened him."
Context: Rostov's internal struggle about his feelings for Princess Mary
This reveals how sometimes we're attracted to people who challenge our assumptions about what we want. Rostov is scared because Mary doesn't fit his usual pattern, suggesting she might offer something deeper but unfamiliar.
In Today's Words:
He couldn't imagine what dating her would actually look like, and that freaked him out.
Thematic Threads
Authenticity
In This Chapter
Mary transforms from anxious overthinking to natural grace when with someone who sees her true worth
Development
Building on earlier themes of social performance versus genuine self
In Your Life:
Notice which relationships let you be yourself versus which ones make you perform a role.
Class Expectations
In This Chapter
The governor's wife orchestrates meetings based on social position rather than personal compatibility
Development
Continues the tension between arranged social matches and genuine connection
In Your Life:
External pressure to choose partners based on status or others' expectations often conflicts with natural attraction.
Inner Conflict
In This Chapter
Rostóv feels swept along by forces beyond his control despite his promise to Sónya
Development
Echoes earlier struggles between duty and desire throughout the novel
In Your Life:
Sometimes we find ourselves drawn to people or situations despite our previous commitments or logical plans.
Recognition
In This Chapter
Rostóv sees Mary's years of sacrifice and spiritual growth shining through her manner
Development
Develops the theme of seeing beyond surface appearances to true character
In Your Life:
The people who truly matter are those who recognize and value your actual qualities, not your performance.
Social Pressure
In This Chapter
Multiple forces push Rostóv toward a proposal despite his uncertainty and existing commitments
Development
Continues exploring how society shapes individual choices through expectations and arrangements
In Your Life:
Well-meaning friends and family often pressure us into relationships or decisions that serve their vision rather than our needs.
You now have the context. Time to form your own thoughts.
Discussion Questions
- 1
What happens to Princess Mary's anxiety when Rostóv actually arrives, and how does this surprise even her?
analysis • surface - 2
Why does Mary become naturally graceful and confident with Rostóv when she was overthinking everything just moments before?
analysis • medium - 3
Think about someone who brings out your best self versus someone who makes you feel anxious or fake. What's the difference in how they treat you?
application • medium - 4
Rostóv feels 'swept along by forces beyond his control' despite his promise to Sónya. How do you handle situations where your heart pulls you one way but your commitments point another?
application • deep - 5
What does this chapter reveal about how the right person can unlock qualities in us that we didn't even know we had?
reflection • deep
Critical Thinking Exercise
Map Your Relationship Energy
Make two lists: people who bring out your best self (you feel natural, confident, authentic) and people who make you feel anxious or fake (you overthink, perform, or shut down). For each person, write one word describing how you feel around them. Look for patterns in what creates psychological safety versus what triggers your defenses.
Consider:
- •Notice if certain types of people consistently appear in each category
- •Consider how you might be affecting others the same way
- •Think about what this reveals about compatibility in relationships
Journaling Prompt
Write about a time when someone saw your true worth and it transformed how you felt about yourself. What did they notice that others missed? How did their recognition change your behavior or confidence?
Coming Up Next...
Chapter 270: Prayer Answered, Freedom Found
In the next chapter, you'll discover crisis reveals what we truly value in relationships, and learn timing matters when making major life decisions. These insights reveal timeless patterns that resonate in our own lives and relationships.