Summary
Sue and Jude receive news that their divorces are final, making them legally free to marry. While Jude celebrates this milestone, Sue responds with unexpected ambivalence. During a walk in the countryside, Jude assumes they'll now marry 'after a decent interval,' but Sue reveals she'd rather continue living as unmarried lovers. She fears that marriage contracts kill romance, turning love into legal obligation. Jude grows frustrated with Sue's evasiveness about her feelings, demanding honest declarations of love that she consistently avoids giving. Their conversation turns tense when Jude lectures her about women who play 'games of elusiveness,' causing Sue to withdraw emotionally. The chapter reveals the fundamental disconnect between them: Jude craves security and commitment while Sue values freedom and spontaneity. Despite their deep connection, they're working toward opposite goals. Sue's reluctance isn't just about marriage—it's about her fear of being truly known and her uncertainty about her own capacity for love. Meanwhile, Jude has started a modest business as a monumental mason, creating headstones for poor neighbors, with Sue helping with the lettering work. This represents both a step down professionally and a step toward independence. The chapter explores how even when external obstacles are removed, internal fears and mismatched expectations can create new barriers to happiness.
Coming Up in Chapter 36
An evening lecture on ancient history sets the stage for Sue's troubling silence when Jude returns home. Something has shifted during his absence, and her troubled expression suggests difficult conversations ahead.
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An excerpt from the original text.(~500 words)
How Gillingham’s doubts were disposed of will most quickly appear by passing over the series of dreary months and incidents that followed the events of the last chapter, and coming on to a Sunday in the February of the year following. Sue and Jude were living in Aldbrickham, in precisely the same relations that they had established between themselves when she left Shaston to join him the year before. The proceedings in the law-courts had reached their consciousness, but as a distant sound and an occasional missive which they hardly understood. They had met, as usual, to breakfast together in the little house with Jude’s name on it, that he had taken at fifteen pounds a year, with three-pounds-ten extra for rates and taxes, and furnished with his aunt’s ancient and lumbering goods, which had cost him about their full value to bring all the way from Marygreen. Sue kept house, and managed everything. As he entered the room this morning Sue held up a letter she had just received. “Well; and what is it about?” he said after kissing her. “That the decree _nisi_ in the case of Phillotson _versus_ Phillotson and Fawley, pronounced six months ago, has just been made absolute.” “Ah,” said Jude, as he sat down. The same concluding incident in Jude’s suit against Arabella had occurred about a month or two earlier. Both cases had been too insignificant to be reported in the papers, further than by name in a long list of other undefended cases. “Now then, Sue, at any rate, you can do what you like!” He looked at his sweetheart curiously. “Are we—you and I—just as free now as if we had never married at all?” “Just as free—except, I believe, that a clergyman may object personally to remarry you, and hand the job on to somebody else.” “But I wonder—do you think it is really so with us? I know it is generally. But I have an uncomfortable feeling that my freedom has been obtained under false pretences!” “How?” “Well—if the truth about us had been known, the decree wouldn’t have been pronounced. It is only, is it, because we have made no defence, and have led them into a false supposition? Therefore is my freedom lawful, however proper it may be?” “Well—why did you let it be under false pretences? You have only yourself to blame,” he said mischievously. “Jude—don’t! You ought not to be touchy about that still. You must take me as I am.” “Very well, darling: so I will. Perhaps you were right. As to your question, we were not obliged to prove anything. That was their business. Anyhow we are living together.” “Yes. Though not in their sense.” “One thing is certain, that however the decree may be brought about, a marriage is dissolved when it is dissolved. There is this advantage in being poor obscure people like us—that these things are done for us in a rough and ready fashion. It was the same with...
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Intelligence Amplifier™ Analysis
The Freedom Paradox - When Getting What You Want Reveals What You Actually Fear
The tendency to create new obstacles or find fault with desired outcomes when external barriers are removed, revealing underlying fears about vulnerability and commitment.
Why This Matters
Connect literature to life
This chapter teaches how to recognize when people (including yourself) manufacture new problems when old obstacles disappear.
Practice This Today
This week, notice when someone gets what they said they wanted but suddenly finds reasons it's not quite right—then ask what they might actually be afraid of.
Now let's explore the literary elements.
Terms to Know
decree nisi
A provisional divorce decree that becomes final after a waiting period. In Victorian England, this was the first stage of divorce, followed by the decree absolute that legally ended the marriage. The waiting period was meant to allow for reconciliation or to contest the divorce.
Modern Usage:
Today we call this a 'temporary divorce order' - the paperwork is filed but there's still a waiting period before it's completely final.
undefended divorce
A divorce where one spouse doesn't contest or fight the proceedings. These cases were processed quickly and quietly, often just listed by name in newspapers without details. Most working-class divorces fell into this category.
Modern Usage:
This is like an 'uncontested divorce' today - when both parties agree to split without fighting over terms in court.
monumental mason
A craftsman who carved headstones, memorial tablets, and other stone monuments for graves. This was considered skilled labor but lower in status than architectural stonework. It was steady work since people always needed grave markers.
Modern Usage:
Today this would be like running a small memorial or trophy engraving business - specialized craft work that serves a consistent local need.
living in sin
Victorian term for unmarried couples living together as if married. This was socially scandalous and could result in social ostracism, job loss, and being refused housing or services. The stigma was especially harsh for women.
Modern Usage:
This is what older generations still sometimes call 'living together' or cohabitation before marriage.
decent interval
The socially expected waiting period after divorce before remarrying. Victorian society demanded this show of propriety, especially for women. Rushing into marriage too quickly suggested the divorce was planned or that adultery had occurred.
Modern Usage:
Like the unwritten rule about waiting before dating after a breakup - society still judges people who 'move on too fast.'
rates and taxes
Local property taxes paid to the parish or municipality for services like poor relief, road maintenance, and local government. These were separate from rent and could be a significant burden for working-class families.
Modern Usage:
This is basically property taxes and local fees - the extra costs of homeownership beyond just the mortgage or rent.
Characters in This Chapter
Sue
conflicted lover
Receives news of her divorce being final but responds with unexpected reluctance about marriage. She wants to continue living as unmarried lovers, fearing that legal marriage will destroy their romance by turning love into obligation.
Modern Equivalent:
The partner who panics when talk turns to engagement - loves the relationship but fears commitment will ruin it
Jude
frustrated partner
Celebrates their legal freedom and assumes they'll marry after a decent interval. Grows increasingly frustrated with Sue's evasiveness about her feelings and her reluctance to commit, demanding honest declarations of love she won't give.
Modern Equivalent:
The person ready to take the next step who can't understand why their partner keeps pulling back
Phillotson
absent ex-husband
Though not present in the chapter, his divorce from Sue is finalized, legally freeing her. His case was undefended and processed quietly, showing how their marriage ended without drama or contest.
Modern Equivalent:
The ex who signs the divorce papers without a fight - present only through legal documents
Arabella
absent ex-wife
Her divorce from Jude was also finalized a month or two earlier, clearing the legal path for him to remarry. Like Phillotson's case, it was undefended and unremarkable.
Modern Equivalent:
The ex-spouse who's moved on - only relevant now for paperwork purposes
Key Quotes & Analysis
"That the decree nisi in the case of Phillotson versus Phillotson and Fawley, pronounced six months ago, has just been made absolute."
Context: Sue reads the legal notice about her divorce being finalized
This formal legal language contrasts with the emotional reality of the situation. The bureaucratic tone shows how the law reduces complex human relationships to paperwork and procedures.
In Today's Words:
The divorce is officially final now - we're legally free.
"I thought we might marry after a decent interval."
Context: Jude assumes they'll now proceed to marriage after their divorces are final
Jude's assumption reveals his conventional thinking despite their unconventional situation. He still believes in following social expectations even after breaking so many rules to be together.
In Today's Words:
I figured we'd wait a little while and then make it official.
"I don't want to marry you, Jude. I would much rather live with you as we are living now."
Context: Sue reveals her preference to remain unmarried lovers rather than become husband and wife
This shocking statement reveals Sue's fear that marriage contracts kill romance. She sees legal obligation as the enemy of genuine feeling, preferring the uncertainty of choice to the security of commitment.
In Today's Words:
I don't want to get married. I like what we have now - why mess with it?
Thematic Threads
Freedom vs Security
In This Chapter
Sue wants freedom from marriage constraints while Jude seeks security through legal commitment—their opposite needs create conflict even when external obstacles disappear
Development
Evolved from earlier chapters where external barriers seemed to be the main problem—now reveals internal conflicts were always the real issue
In Your Life:
You might recognize this when you get what you asked for at work or in relationships but find yourself creating new reasons why it's not quite right.
Emotional Honesty
In This Chapter
Jude demands direct declarations of love that Sue consistently avoids giving, revealing her inability to be emotionally transparent even with herself
Development
Building on Sue's pattern of intellectual evasion—now showing how this affects intimate relationships
In Your Life:
You see this in relationships where someone demands 'honesty' but the other person literally can't access their real feelings to share them.
Class and Work
In This Chapter
Jude starts a modest headstone business for poor neighbors—a step down professionally but toward independence and serving his community
Development
Continuation of Jude's journey away from academic aspirations toward practical work that actually helps people
In Your Life:
This shows up when you realize the 'prestigious' path isn't serving you and consider work that feels more meaningful even if it pays less.
Mismatched Expectations
In This Chapter
Despite deep connection, Jude and Sue are working toward completely opposite relationship goals—he wants commitment, she wants continued spontaneity
Development
Introduced here as the core relationship dynamic that will drive future conflict
In Your Life:
You might see this in friendships or relationships where you assume you want the same things but never actually checked.
Self-Knowledge
In This Chapter
Sue's reluctance reveals her uncertainty about her own capacity for love and fear of being truly known by another person
Development
Deepening exploration of Sue's internal conflicts beyond just social rebellion
In Your Life:
This appears when you realize you've been avoiding certain situations not because of external factors but because you're not sure who you really are underneath.
You now have the context. Time to form your own thoughts.
Discussion Questions
- 1
Sue and Jude finally get their divorces, but Sue doesn't want to marry. What reasons does she give, and how does Jude react?
analysis • surface - 2
Why do you think Sue suddenly finds problems with marriage now that it's actually possible? What might she really be afraid of?
analysis • medium - 3
Have you ever seen someone (maybe yourself) get what they said they wanted, then find new reasons why it won't work? What was really going on?
application • medium - 4
If you were Jude's friend, how would you advise him to handle Sue's sudden change of heart? What would you tell him about reading the real message behind her words?
application • deep - 5
What does this chapter reveal about the difference between wanting something and being ready for it? How can you tell the difference in your own life?
reflection • deep
Critical Thinking Exercise
Decode the Real Fear
Think of a situation where someone (yourself or someone you know) got what they said they wanted but then found reasons to avoid it or sabotage it. Write down what they said they wanted, what obstacles they originally blamed, and what new problems they discovered once those obstacles were gone. Then dig deeper: what do you think they were actually afraid of?
Consider:
- •Look for patterns where external excuses shift to new excuses once the first ones disappear
- •Consider what vulnerability or risk the person might be trying to avoid
- •Notice the difference between stated preferences and underlying fears
Journaling Prompt
Write about a time when you got something you thought you wanted but then felt scared or resistant. What were you really afraid would happen if you fully embraced it?
Coming Up Next...
Chapter 36: The Past Returns to Claim Its Due
As the story unfolds, you'll explore unresolved relationships can destabilize current ones, while uncovering the power dynamics that emerge when jealousy meets guilt. These lessons connect the classic to contemporary challenges we all face.