The Interior Castle

DESCRIBES THE GRIEF FELT ON ACCOUNT OF THEIR SINS BY SOULS ON WHOM GOD
HAS BESTOWED THE BEFORE-MENTIONED FAVOURS. SHOWS THAT HOWEVER SPIRITUAL
A PERSON MAY BE, IT IS A GREAT ERROR NOT TO KEEP BEFORE OUR MIND THE
HUMANITY OF OUR LORD AND SAVIOUR JESUS CHRIST AND HIS SACRED PASSION
AND LIFE, AS ALSO THE GLORIOUS MOTHER OF GOD AND THE SAINTS. THE
BENEFITS GAINED BY SUCH A MEDITATION. THIS CHAPTER IS MOST PROFITABLE.

1. Sorrow for sin felt by souls in the Sixth Mansion. 2. How this
sorrow is felt. 3. St. Teresa's grief for her past sins. 4. Such souls,
centred in God, forget self-interest. 5. The remembrance of divine
benefits increases contrition. 6. Meditation on our Lord's Humanity. 7.
Warning against discontinuing it. 8. Christ and the saints our models.
9. Meditation of contemplatives. 10. Meditation during aridity. 11. We
must search for God when we do not feel His presence. 12. Reasoning and
mental prayer. 13. A form of meditation on our Lord's Life and Passion.
14. Simplicity of contemplatives' meditation. 15. Souls in every state
of prayer should think of the Passion. 16. Need of the example of
Christ and the saints. 17. Faith shows us our Lord as both God and Man.
18. St. Teresa's experience of meditation on the sacred Humanity. 19.
Evil of giving up such meditation.

1. IT may seem to you, sisters, that souls to whom God has communicated
Himself in such a special manner may feel so sure of enjoying Him for
ever as no longer to require to fear or to mourn over their past sins.
Those of you will be most apt to hold this opinion who have never
received the like favours; souls to whom God has granted these graces
will understand what I say. This is a great mistake, for sorrow for sin
increases in proportion to the divine grace received and I believe will
never quit us until we come to the land where nothing can grieve us any
more. Doubtless we feel this pain more at one time than at another and
it is of a different kind. A soul so advanced as that we speak of does
not think of the punishment threatening its offences but of its great
ingratitude towards Him to Whom it owes so much [329] and Who so
justly deserves that it should serve Him, for the sublime mysteries
revealed have taught it much about the greatness of God.

2. This soul wonders at its former temerity and weeps over its
irreverence; its foolishness in the past seems a madness which it never
ceases to lament as it remembers for what vile things it forsook so
great a Sovereign. The thoughts dwell on this more than on the favours
received, which, like those I am about to describe, are so powerful
that they seem to rush through the soul at times like a strong, swift
river. Yet the sins remain like the mire in the river bed and dwell
constantly in the memory, making a heavy cross to bear.

3. I know some one who, though she had ceased to wish for death in
order to see God, [330] yet desired it that she might be freed from
her continual regret for her past ingratitude towards Him to Whom she
owed, and always would owe, so much. She thought no one's guilt could
be compared to her own, for she felt there could be none with whom God
had borne so patiently nor on whom He had bestowed such graces.

4. Souls that have reached the state I speak of have ceased to fear
hell. At times, though very rarely, they grieve keenly over the
possibility of their losing God; their sole dread is lest He should
withdraw His hand, allowing them to offend Him, and so they might
return to their former miserable condition. They care nothing for their
own pain or glory; if they are anxious not to stay long in Purgatory,
it is more on account of its keeping them from the Presence of God than
because of its torments. Whatever favours God may have shown a soul, I
think it is dangerous for it to forget the unhappy state it was once
in; painful as the remembrance may be, it is most beneficial.

5. Perhaps I think so because I have been so wicked and that may be the
reason why I never forget my sins; people who have led good lives have
no cause for grief; yet we always fall at times whilst living in this
mortal body. This pain is not lessened by reflecting that our Lord has
already forgiven and forgotten our faults; our grief is rather
increased at seeing such kindness and favours bestowed on one who
deserves nothing but hell. I think St. Paul and the Magdalen must thus
have suffered a cruel martyrdom; [331] their love was intense, they
had received many mercies and realized the greatness and the majesty of
God and so must have found it very hard to bear the remembrance of
their sins, which they must have regretted with a most tender sorrow.

6. You may fancy that one who has enjoyed such high favours need not
meditate on the mysteries of the most sacred Humanity of our Lord Jesus
Christ but will be wholly absorbed in love. I have written fully about
this elsewhere. [332] I have been contradicted and told that I was
wrong and did not understand the matter; that our Lord guides souls in
such a way that after having made progress it is best to exercise
oneself in matters concerning the Godhead and to avoid what is
corporeal; yet nothing will make me admit that this latter is a good
way.

7. I may be mistaken; we may all really mean the same thing but I found
the devil was trying to lead me astray in this manner. Having been
warned by experience in this respell, I have decided to speak again
about it here although I have very often done so elsewhere. [333] Be
most cautious on the subject; attend to what I venture to say about it
and do not believe any one who tells you the contrary. I will endeavour
to explain myself more clearly than I did before. If the person who
undertook to write on the matter had treated it more explicitly he
would have done well, for it may do much harm to speak of it in general
terms to us women, who have scanty wits.

8. Some souls imagine they cannot meditate even on the Passion, still
less on the most blessed Virgin or on the saints, the memory of whose
lives greatly benefits and strengthens us. [334] I cannot think what
such persons are to meditate upon, for to withdraw the thoughts from
all corporeal things like the angelic spirits who are always inflamed
with love, is not possible for us while in this mortal flesh; we need
to study, to meditate upon and to imitate those who, mortals like
ourselves, performed such heroic deeds for God. How much less should we
wilfully endeavour to abstain from thinking of our only good and
remedy, the most sacred Humanity of our Lord Jesus Christ? I cannot
believe that any one really does this; they misunderstand their own
minds and so harm both themselves and others. Of this at least I can
assure them: they will never thus enter the last two mansions of the
castle. If they lose their Guide, our good Jesus, they cannot find the
way and it will be much if they have stayed safely in the former
mansions. Our Lord Himself tells us that He is the Way'; He also says
that He is the Light'; that no man cometh to the Father but by Him; and
that He that seeth Me, seeth the Father also.' [335]

9. Such persons tell us that these words have some other meaning; I
know of no other meaning but this, which my soul has ever recognized as
the true one and which has always suited me right well. Some people
(many of whom have spoken to me on the subject) after our Lord has once
raised them to perfect contemplation, wish to enjoy it continually.
This is impossible; still, the grace of this state remains in their
souls in such a way that they cannot reason as before on the mysteries
of the Passion and the Life of Christ. I cannot account for it but it
is very usual for the mind thus to remain less apt for meditation. I
think it must be because, as the one end of meditation is to seek God,
after He has once been found and the soul is accustomed to seek Him
again by means of the will, it no longer wearies itself by searching
for Him with the intellect.

10. It also appears to me that as the will is already inflamed with
love, this generous faculty would, if it could, cease to make use of
the reason. This would be well, were it not impossible, especially
before the soul has reached the last two mansions. [336] Time spent
in prayer would thus be lost as the will often needs the use of the
understanding to rekindle its love. Notice this point, sisters, which
as it is important I will explain more fully. Such a soul desires to
spend all its time in loving God and wishes to do nothing else; but it
cannot succeed, for though the will is not dead yet the flame which
kindled it is dying out and the spark needs fanning into a glow. Ought
the soul to remain quiescent in this aridity, waiting like our father
Elias for fire to descend from heaven [337] to consume the sacrifice
which it makes of itself to God? Certainly not; it is not right to
expect miracles; God will work them for this soul when He chooses. As I
have told you already and shall do again, His Majesty wishes us to hold
ourselves unworthy of their being wrought on our account and desires us
to help ourselves to the best of our abilities.

11. In my opinion we ought during our whole life, to act in this
manner, however sublime our prayer may be. True, those whom our Lord
admits into the seventh mansion rarely or never need thus to help their
fervour, for the reason I will tell you of; if I recollect it when I
come to write of this room where, in a wonderful manner, souls are
constantly in the company of Christ our Lord both in His Humanity and
His Divinity. [338] Thus, when the fire in our hearts, of which I
spoke does not burn in the will, nor do we feel the presence of God, we
must search for Him as He would have us do, like the Bride in the
Canticles, [339] and must ask all creatures who it was that made
them;' as St. Augustine (either in his Soliloquies or his Confessions)
tells us that he did. [340] Thus we shall not stand like blockheads,
wasting our time in waiting for what we before enjoyed. At first, it
may be that our Lord will not renew His gift again for a year or even
for many years; His Majesty knows the reason which we should not try to
discover since there is no need for us to understand it.

12. As most certainly the way to please God is to keep the commandments
and counsels, let us do so diligently, while meditating on His life and
death and all we owe Him; then let the rest be as God chooses. Some may
answer that their mind refuses to dwell on these subjects; and for the
above causes, this to a certain extent is true. You know that it is one
thing to reason and another thing for the memory to bring certain
truths before the mind. Perhaps you may not understand me; possibly I
fail to express myself rightly but I will do my best. Using the
understanding much in this manner is what I call meditation.

13. Let us begin by considering the mercy God showed us by giving us
His only Son; let us not stop here but go on to reflect upon all the
mysteries of His glorious life; or let us first turn our thoughts to
His prayer in the garden, then allow them to continue the subject until
they reach the crucifixion. Or we may take some part of the Passion
such as Christ's apprehension and dwell on this mystery, considering in
detail the points to be pondered and thought over, such as the
treachery of Judas, the flight of the Apostles, and all that followed.
This is an admirable and very meritorious kind of prayer. [341]

14. Souls led by God in supernatural ways and raised to perfect
contemplation are right in declaring they cannot practise this kind of
meditation. As I said, I know not why, but as a rule they are unable to
do so. Yet they would be wrong in saying that they cannot dwell on
these mysteries nor frequently think about them, especially when these
events are being celebrated by the Catholic Church. Nor is it possible
for the soul which has received so much from God to forget these
precious proofs of His love which are living sparks to inflame the
heart with greater love for our Lord, nor can the mind fail to
understand them. Such a soul comprehends these mysteries, which are
brought before the mind and stamped on the memory in a more perfect way
than with other people, so that the mere sight of our Lord prostrate in
the garden, covered with His terrible sweat, suffices to engross the
thoughts not merely for an hour but for several days. The soul looks
with a simple gaze upon Who He is and how ungratefully we treat Him in
return for such terrible sufferings. Then the will, although perhaps
without sensible tenderness, desires to render Him some service for
such sublime mercies and longs to suffer something for Him Who bore so
much for us, employing itself in similar considerations in which the
memory and understanding also take their part.

15. I think this is why such souls cannot reason connectedly about the
Passion and fancy they are unable to mediate on it. Those who do not
meditate on this subject had better begin to do so; for I know that it
will not impede the most sublime prayer nor is it well to omit praising
this often. If God then sees fit to enrapture them, well and good; even
if they are reluctant, He will make them cease to meditate. I am
certain that this way of king is most helpful to the soul and not the
hindrance it would become were great efforts made to use the intellect.
This, as I said, I believe cannot be done when a higher state of prayer
is attained. It may be otherwise in some cases, for God leads souls in
many different ways. Let not those be blamed, however, who are unable
to discourse much in prayer, nor should they be judged incapable of
enjoying the great graces contained in the mysteries of Jesus Christ,
our only Good, which no one, however spiritual he may be, can persuade
me it is well to omit contemplating. 16. There are souls who, having
made a beginning, or advanced half-way, when they begin to experience
the prayer of quiet and to taste the sweetness and consolations God
gives, think it is a great thing to enjoy these spiritual pleasures
continually. Let them, as I advised elsewhere, cease to give themselves
up so much to this absorption. Life is long and full of crosses and we
have need to look on Christ our pattern, to see how He bore His trials,
and even to take example by His Apostles and saints if we would bear
our own trials perfectly. Our good Jesus and His most blessed Mother
are too good company to be left and He is well pleased if we grieve at
His pains, even though sometimes at the cost of our own consolations
and joys. [342] Besides, daughters, consolations are not so frequent
in prayer that we have no time for this as well. If any one should tell
me she continually enjoys them, and that she is one of those who can
never meditate on the divine mysteries, I should feel very doubtful
about her state. Be convinced of this; keep free from this deception
and to the utmost of your power stop yourselves from being constantly
immersed in this intoxication. If you cannot do so, tell the Prioress
so that she may employ you too busily for you to think of the matter;
thus you will be free from this danger which, if it does no more, when
it lasts long, greatly injures the health and brain. I have said enough
to prove to those who require it that, however spiritual their state,
it is an error so to avoid thinking of corporeal things as to imagine
that meditation on the most sacred Humanity can injure the soul.

17. People allege, in defence, that our Lord told His disciples that it
was expedient for them that He should go from them. [343] This I
cannot admit. He did not say so to His blessed Mother, for her faith
was firm. She knew He was both God and man; and although she loved Him
more dearly than did His disciples, it was in so perfect a way that His
bodily presence was a help to her. The faith of the Apostles must have
been weaker than it was later on, and than ours has reason to be. I
assure you, daughters, that I consider this a most dangerous idea
whereby the devil might end by robbing us of our devotion to the most
blessed Sacrament.

18. The mistake I formerly made [344] did not lead me as far as this,
but I did not care so much about meditating on our Lord Jesus Christ,
preferring to remain absorbed, awaiting spiritual consolations. I
recognized clearly that I was going wrong, for as I could not always
keep in this state, my thoughts wandered hither and thither and my soul
seemed like a bird, ever flying about and finding no place for rest.
Thus I lost much time and did not advance in virtue nor make progress
in prayer.

19. I did not understand the reason, and as I believed that I was
acting wisely I think I should never have learnt it but for the advice
of a servant of God whom I consulted about my mode of prayer. Then I
perceived plainly how mistaken I had been and I have never ceased
regretting that there was a time when I did not realize how difficult
it would be to gain by so great a loss. Even if I could, I would seek
for nothing save by Him through Whom comes all the good we possess. May
He be for ever praised! Amen.
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[329] Life, ch. vi. 7.

[330] Excl. vi. 4, 5. Supra, M. v. ch. ii, 5. Poems 2, 3, 4. Minor
Works.

[331] Life, ch. xxi, 9. All editions have Peter'. St. Teresa only wrote
'Po' but the parallel passage proves she meant Pablo, and not Pedro.
See also M. i. ch. i. 5.

[332] Life, ch. xxii. 9-11.

[333] Ibid. ch. xxii. i; xxiii. 18; xxiv. 2.

[334] 'Deliberate forgetfulness and rejection of all knowledge and of
form must never be extended to Christ and His sacred Humanity.
Sometimes, indeed, in the height of contemplation and pure intuition of
the Divinity the soul does not remember the Sacred Humanity, because
God raises the mind to this, as it were, confused and most supernatural
knowledge; but for all this, studiously to forget it is by no means
right, for the contemplation of the sacred Humanity and loving
meditation upon it will help us up to all good, and it is by it we
shall ascend most easily to the highest state of union. It is evident
at once that, while all visible and bodily things ought to be
forgotten, for they are a hindrance in our way, He, Who for our
salvation became man, is not to be accounted among them, for He is the
truth, the door, and the way, and our guide to all good.' (St. John of
the Cross Ascent of Mount Carmel, bk. iii. ch. i. 12-14.

[335] St. John viii. 12; xiv. 6, 9.

[336] Life, ch. xv. 20. St. John of the Cross treats the subject most
carefully. He shows how and when meditation becomes impossible: Ascent
of Mount Carmel, bk. ii. ch. xii. (circa finem) ch. xiii. (per totum).
Living Flame of Love, stanza iii. 35. Obscure Night, bk. i. ch. x. 8,
and bk. ii. ch. viii. That it should be procured whenever possible:
Ibid. bk. i. ch. x. (in fine); that it should be resumed; Ascent of
Mount Carmel; bk. ii, ch. xv.

[337] III Reg. xviii. 30-39.

[338] Continual sense of the presence of God: Life, ch. xxvii. 6. Rel.
xi. 3: The intellectual vision of the Three Persons and of the Sacred
Humanity seems ever present.' Castle, M. vii. ch. iv. 15.

[339] Cant, iii. 3; Num quem diligit anima mea, vidistis?'

[340] 'I asked the earth, and it answered me: I am not He'; and
whatsoever it contains confessed the same. I asked the sea and the
depths, and the living, creeping things, and they answered: We are not
thy God, seek above us.' I asked the heavens, I asked the moving air;
and the whole air with its inhabitants answered: 'Anaximenes was
deceived, I am not God.' I asked the heavens, sun, moon, stars. 'Nor,'
say they, are we the God Whom thou seekest.' And I replied unto all
things which encompass the door of my flesh: Ye have told me of my God,
that ye are not He; tell me something of Him.' And they cried out with
a loud voice: 'He made us.' By my thought of them I questioned them,
and their beauty gave their answer.' (St. Augustine's Confessions, bk.
x. ch. 6.) St. Teresa may have read this in St. Augustine's
Confessions, (see above, p. 78), or in the Soliloquies, a collection of
extracts from St. Augustine, St. Bernard, St. Anselm, etc., which was
printed in Latin at Venice in 1512, translated into Spanish and brought
out at Valladolid in 1515, and again at Medina del Campo in 15 53, and
at Toledo in 1565. The words quoted by St. Teresa occur in chapter
xxxi. See Life, ch. xl. 10.

[341] Life, ch. xiii. 17-23.

[342] Way of Perf. ch. xxv. 7.

[343] St. John xvi. 7: Expedit vobis ut ego vadam; si enim non abiero,
Paraclitus non veniet ad vos.' Life, ch. xxii. 1, 2 and note.

[344] Life, ch. xxii. 11. Although the Saint defends herself against
the charge of self-contradiction, there can be no doubt from this
avowal that she too was at one time mistaken on this point.
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