Don Quixote

WHEREIN IT IS TOLD AND KNOWN WHO THE KNIGHT OF THE MIRRORS AND HIS
SQUIRE WERE
Don Quixote went off satisfied, elated, and vain-glorious in the
highest degree at having won a victory over such a valiant knight as he
fancied him of the Mirrors to be, and one from whose knightly word he
expected to learn whether the enchantment of his lady still continued;
inasmuch as the said vanquished knight was bound, under the penalty of
ceasing to be one, to return and render him an account of what took
place between him and her. But Don Quixote was of one mind, he of the
Mirrors of another, for he just then had no thought of anything but
finding some village where he could plaster himself, as has been said
already. The history goes on to say, then, that when the bachelor
Samson Carrasco recommended Don Quixote to resume his knight-errantry
which he had laid aside, it was in consequence of having been
previously in conclave with the curate and the barber on the means to
be adopted to induce Don Quixote to stay at home in peace and quiet
without worrying himself with his ill-starred adventures; at which
consultation it was decided by the unanimous vote of all, and on the
special advice of Carrasco, that Don Quixote should be allowed to go,
as it seemed impossible to restrain him, and that Samson should sally
forth to meet him as a knight-errant, and do battle with him, for there
would be no difficulty about a cause, and vanquish him, that being
looked upon as an easy matter; and that it should be agreed and settled
that the vanquished was to be at the mercy of the victor. Then, Don
Quixote being vanquished, the bachelor knight was to command him to
return to his village and his house, and not quit it for two years, or
until he received further orders from him; all which it was clear Don
Quixote would unhesitatingly obey, rather than contravene or fail to
observe the laws of chivalry; and during the period of his seclusion he
might perhaps forget his folly, or there might be an opportunity of
discovering some ready remedy for his madness. Carrasco undertook the
task, and Tom Cecial, a gossip and neighbour of Sancho Panza’s, a
lively, feather-headed fellow, offered himself as his squire. Carrasco
armed himself in the fashion described, and Tom Cecial, that he might
not be known by his gossip when they met, fitted on over his own
natural nose the false masquerade one that has been mentioned; and so
they followed the same route Don Quixote took, and almost came up with
him in time to be present at the adventure of the cart of Death and
finally encountered them in the grove, where all that the sagacious
reader has been reading about took place; and had it not been for the
extraordinary fancies of Don Quixote, and his conviction that the
bachelor was not the bachelor, señor bachelor would have been
incapacitated for ever from taking his degree of licentiate, all
through not finding nests where he thought to find birds.

Tom Cecial, seeing how ill they had succeeded, and what a sorry end
their expedition had come to, said to the bachelor, “Sure enough, Señor
Samson Carrasco, we are served right; it is easy enough to plan and set
about an enterprise, but it is often a difficult matter to come well
out of it. Don Quixote a madman, and we sane; he goes off laughing,
safe, and sound, and you are left sore and sorry! I’d like to know now
which is the madder, he who is so because he cannot help it, or he who
is so of his own choice?”

To which Samson replied, “The difference between the two sorts of
madmen is, that he who is so will he nil he, will be one always, while
he who is so of his own accord can leave off being one whenever he
likes.”

“In that case,” said Tom Cecial, “I was a madman of my own accord when
I volunteered to become your squire, and, of my own accord, I’ll leave
off being one and go home.”

“That’s your affair,” returned Samson, “but to suppose that I am going
home until I have given Don Quixote a thrashing is absurd; and it is
not any wish that he may recover his senses that will make me hunt him
out now, but a wish for the sore pain I am in with my ribs won’t let me
entertain more charitable thoughts.”

Thus discoursing, the pair proceeded until they reached a town where it
was their good luck to find a bone-setter, with whose help the
unfortunate Samson was cured. Tom Cecial left him and went home, while
he stayed behind meditating vengeance; and the history will return to
him again at the proper time, so as not to omit making merry with Don
Quixote now.

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