Summary
The Art of Asking Permission
Evelina, Or, the History of a Young Lady's Entrance into the World by Fanny Burney
Evelina writes to her guardian Mr. Villars with a request that has her tied up in knots. The Mirvan family is preparing for a trip to London, and Lady Howard insists that Evelina should ask permission to join them. What should be a simple request becomes an emotional minefield as Evelina wrestles with her own desires versus her deep respect for her guardian's judgment. She starts confident, claiming she doesn't really care about going, but by the end of the letter, she's practically begging for permission while simultaneously trying to appear indifferent. The chapter reveals the universal struggle of wanting something badly while trying to maintain dignity and not appear selfish. Evelina's internal conflict shows how young people navigate the tension between their own desires and the approval of authority figures they love and respect. Her repeated contradictions—claiming she doesn't care, then admitting she's 'bewitched' by the idea—capture the authentic voice of someone trying to convince themselves as much as the person they're writing to. The mention of London's attractions (playhouses, opera, Ranelagh, the Pantheon) hints at the glittering world that awaits, making her restraint even more poignant. This chapter demonstrates how asking for something you really want requires a delicate balance of honesty, humility, and strategic presentation—skills that remain relevant in any era when we need to make requests of people whose opinion matters to us.
Coming Up in Chapter 9
Mr. Villars must now respond to Evelina's carefully crafted plea. Will her guardian's protective instincts win out, or will he grant permission for her first real venture into society?
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An excerpt from the original text.(~500 words)
EVELINA TO THE REV. MR. VILLARS Howard Grove, March 26. THIS house seems to be the house of joy; every face wears a smile, and a laugh is at every body's service. It is quite amusing to walk about and see the general confusion; a room leading to the garden is fitting up for Captain Mirvan's study. Lady Howard does not sit a moment in a place; Miss Mirvan is making caps; every body so busy!-such flying from room to room!-so many orders given, and retracted, and given again! nothing but hurry and perturbation. Well but, my dear Sir, I am desired to make a request to you. I hope you will not think me an encroacher; Lady Howard insists upon my writing!-yet I hardly know how to go on; a petition implies a want and have you left me one? No, indeed. I am half ashamed of myself for beginning this letter. But these dear ladies are so pressing-I cannot, for my life, resist wishing for the pleasures they offer me,-provided you do not disapprove them. They are to make a very short stay in town. The Captain will meet them in a day or two. Mrs. Mirvan and her sweet daughter both go; what a happy party! Yet, I am not very eager to accompany them: at least I shall be contented to remain where I am, if you desire that I should. Assured, my dearest Sir, of your goodness, your bounty, and your indulgent kindness, ought I to form a wish that has not your sanction? Decide for me, therefore, without the least apprehension that I shall be uneasy or discontented. While I am yet in suspense, perhaps I may hope; but I am most certain that when you have once determined I shall not repine. They tell me that London is now in full splendour. Two playhouses are open,-the Opera-house,-Ranelagh,-and the Pantheon.-You see I have learned all their names. However, pray don't suppose that I make any point of going, for I shall hardly sigh, to see them depart without me, though I shall probably never meet with such another opportunity. And, indeed, their domestic happiness will be so great,-it is natural to wish to partake of it. I believe I am bewitched! I made a resolution, when I began, that I would not be urgent; but my pen-or rather my thoughts, will not suffer me to keep it-for I acknowledge, I must acknowledge, I cannot help wishing for your permission. I almost repent already that I have made this confession; pray forget that you have read it, if this journey is displeasing to you. But I will not write any longer; for the more I think of this affair, the less indifferent to it I find myself. Adieu, my most honoured, most reverenced, most beloved father! for by what other name can I call you? I have no happiness or sorrow, no hope or fear, but what your kindness bestows, or your displeasure may cause....
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Intelligence Amplifier™ Analysis
The Road of Wanting Without Asking
The tendency to minimize or deny our desires when asking for something important, creating confusion and undermining our own requests.
Why This Matters
Connect literature to life
This chapter teaches how to spot when someone (including yourself) is hiding intense desire behind claims of indifference.
Practice This Today
This week, notice when you or others use phrases like 'I don't really care, but...' or 'I'm just asking because someone else suggested it'—these usually signal the opposite of indifference.
Now let's explore the literary elements.
Terms to Know
Guardian
A legal protector who makes decisions for someone under their care, especially young women who couldn't inherit or make major choices independently. In 18th-century England, unmarried women needed male guardians to approve major life decisions.
Modern Usage:
Today we see this in parents controlling adult children's finances, or anyone having to get approval from someone who holds power over their opportunities.
Petition
A formal request, especially to someone in authority. Evelina uses this word to show how seriously she takes asking her guardian for permission, even though it's just a letter.
Modern Usage:
We still 'petition' bosses for time off, parents for permission, or anyone whose approval we need for something important.
Town
When capitalized, this meant London specifically - the center of fashion, culture, and social life. Going to 'Town' was like a small-town person visiting New York City today.
Modern Usage:
We still talk about 'going to the city' or 'making it to the big leagues' when referring to major cultural centers.
Encroacher
Someone who asks for more than they deserve or pushes boundaries inappropriately. Evelina worries she's being greedy or presumptuous by even making this request.
Modern Usage:
Today we worry about being 'that person' who asks for too much or seems entitled when requesting favors or opportunities.
Indulgent kindness
Generous, forgiving love that gives more than strictly necessary. Evelina acknowledges that her guardian has already been incredibly good to her.
Modern Usage:
We recognize this in parents, mentors, or bosses who go above and beyond what's required and make us feel guilty for asking for more.
Perturbation
Excited confusion or agitation. The household is in a happy chaos preparing for the London trip, with everyone rushing around making arrangements.
Modern Usage:
This is the energy before any big trip or event - the frantic packing, planning, and excitement that creates organized chaos.
Characters in This Chapter
Evelina
Protagonist
She's torn between wanting to go to London and not wanting to seem ungrateful or demanding. Her letter reveals someone trying to ask for something while maintaining dignity and showing respect.
Modern Equivalent:
The good kid who rarely asks for anything but really wants this one thing
Rev. Mr. Villars
Guardian figure
Though not physically present, his influence dominates the chapter. Evelina's entire emotional state revolves around gaining his approval and not disappointing him.
Modern Equivalent:
The parent or mentor whose opinion matters so much it controls your decisions even when they're not around
Lady Howard
Advocate
She insists that Evelina write the letter requesting permission to go to London. She's pushing Evelina to ask for what she wants rather than just accepting whatever happens.
Modern Equivalent:
The friend who says 'just ask already' when you're overthinking a simple request
Captain Mirvan
Family patriarch
He's preparing to meet his family in London. His study being prepared shows the household revolving around his schedule and preferences.
Modern Equivalent:
The dad whose travel plans determine the whole family's schedule
Mrs. Mirvan
Maternal figure
She's part of the London trip and represents the kind of gentle, proper company that would make Evelina's guardian more likely to approve the journey.
Modern Equivalent:
The responsible adult friend who makes parents feel better about letting their kid go somewhere
Key Quotes & Analysis
"I am half ashamed of myself for beginning this letter."
Context: She's struggling to ask her guardian for permission to go to London
This perfectly captures the guilt we feel when asking for something we really want. Evelina knows she's been given so much already that requesting more feels selfish, even though it's a reasonable ask.
In Today's Words:
I feel bad for even asking this.
"ssing-I cannot, for my life, resist wishing for the pleasures they offer me,-provided you do not disapprove them. They are to"
Context: She's admitting she really wants to go to London while trying to seem respectful
The dash and qualification show her internal struggle - she's being honest about her desires but immediately hedging with conditions. It's the classic move of asking for something while giving the other person an easy out.
In Today's Words:
I really want this, but only if you're okay with it.
"party! Yet, I am not very eager to accompany them: at least I shall be contented to remain where I am, if you desire that I should. Assured, my"
Context: She's trying to sound casual about something she clearly wants badly
This is transparent reverse psychology. She's claiming she doesn't care while making it clear she absolutely does. It's the kind of thing people do when they're afraid of seeming too needy.
In Today's Words:
I mean, whatever, I don't really care that much... but I totally do.
Thematic Threads
Class Anxiety
In This Chapter
Evelina worries that wanting to see London's elite entertainments reveals unseemly social climbing
Development
Deepening from earlier hints about her uncertain social position
In Your Life:
You might feel this when wanting opportunities that seem 'above your station' or worry others will judge your ambitions.
Authority Relationships
In This Chapter
Evelina's elaborate dance around asking permission shows deep respect mixed with fear of disappointing Mr. Villars
Development
Building on established pattern of seeking approval from father figures
In Your Life:
You see this when asking your boss for time off or requesting something from someone whose opinion really matters to you.
Authentic Communication
In This Chapter
Evelina's contradictory statements reveal the gap between what she says and what she feels
Development
Introduced here as a key challenge for her character
In Your Life:
This shows up when you're afraid to be direct about what you want, especially with people you don't want to disappoint.
Desire and Shame
In This Chapter
Evelina feels ashamed of wanting worldly pleasures and tries to present her request as duty rather than desire
Development
New theme emerging around the conflict between wanting and propriety
In Your Life:
You might experience this when wanting things that feel selfish or when your desires conflict with how you think you should be.
Social Expectations
In This Chapter
The pressure to appear modest and undemanding while still getting what you want creates impossible communication
Development
Continuing theme of navigating social rules that often contradict human nature
In Your Life:
This appears when you're expected to be grateful for opportunities while also advocating for yourself.
You now have the context. Time to form your own thoughts.
Discussion Questions
- 1
What does Evelina claim she feels about going to London, and what does her actual letter reveal about her true feelings?
analysis • surface - 2
Why does Evelina contradict herself so much in this letter - claiming she doesn't care while clearly caring deeply?
analysis • medium - 3
Where do you see this same pattern today - people saying they don't want something while obviously wanting it badly?
application • medium - 4
What would happen if Evelina had been completely honest about wanting to go to London instead of disguising her desire?
application • deep - 5
What does this chapter reveal about how we protect ourselves when asking for things from people whose approval we need?
reflection • deep
Critical Thinking Exercise
Rewrite the Honest Request
Rewrite Evelina's letter as if she decided to be completely honest about wanting to go to London. Keep the same respect for Mr. Villars, but remove all the contradictions and disguised desires. Write what a direct, honest request would sound like while still showing love and respect for his judgment.
Consider:
- •How can you express strong desire without sounding demanding or selfish?
- •What's the difference between honest vulnerability and emotional manipulation?
- •How might Mr. Villars respond differently to direct honesty versus disguised pleading?
Journaling Prompt
Write about a time when you wanted something badly but convinced yourself (and tried to convince others) that you didn't really care. What happened? How might the situation have played out differently with direct honesty?
Coming Up Next...
Chapter 9: A Father's Blessing and Fears
Moving forward, we'll examine loving authority means knowing when to let go, and understand setting boundaries shows care, not control. These insights bridge the gap between classic literature and modern experience.
