Summary
Epictetus delivers one of philosophy's most practical pieces of advice: keep death and other 'terrible' things in your daily thoughts. This isn't about being morbid or depressed—it's about gaining perspective. When you remember that your time is limited, that job could disappear, or that health isn't guaranteed, something powerful happens. You stop sweating the small stuff. You stop desperately wanting things that don't really matter. That coworker who annoys you? The promotion you're obsessing over? The expensive thing you think you need? All of it shrinks to proper size when viewed against life's bigger realities. Epictetus learned this the hard way—as a slave who became disabled, he knew firsthand how quickly circumstances can change. But rather than making him bitter, this knowledge freed him. When you accept that loss and difficulty are part of life, you stop living in denial. You make better choices because you're not pretending you have unlimited time or that everything will always stay the same. This isn't pessimism—it's realism that leads to better living. The person who remembers their mortality doesn't waste time on grudges, doesn't chase status symbols desperately, and doesn't take good moments for granted. They live with clarity because they understand what actually matters.
Coming Up in Chapter 22
But what happens when you start taking philosophy seriously and people around you think you've lost your mind? Epictetus prepares us for the social cost of thinking differently and how to handle the inevitable mockery.
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An excerpt from the original text.(complete · 32 words)
Let death and exile, and all other things which appear terrible, be daily before your eyes, but death chiefly; and you will never entertain an abject thought, nor too eagerly covet anything.
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Intelligence Amplifier™ Analysis
The Road of Perspective - How Remembering Life's Limits Creates Freedom
Accepting life's temporary nature automatically filters out trivial concerns and sharpens focus on what truly matters.
Why This Matters
Connect literature to life
This chapter teaches how to use awareness of life's temporary nature as a decision-making filter that eliminates trivial concerns and clarifies priorities.
Practice This Today
This week, notice when you're stressed about something and ask: 'If I only had six months at this job, would this still matter?' Use that clarity to guide your choices.
Now let's explore the literary elements.
Terms to Know
Memento Mori
The practice of remembering death - keeping mortality in mind to gain perspective on life. Epictetus advocates thinking about death daily not to be morbid, but to clarify what truly matters.
Modern Usage:
We see this in sayings like 'life is short' or when people say a health scare 'put things in perspective.'
Exile
Being forced to leave your home and community, often as punishment. In Roman times, this was a common fate that could happen to anyone who fell out of political favor.
Modern Usage:
Today we might face job loss, divorce, or having to move away from family - sudden changes that uproot our whole life.
Abject Thought
Low, degrading, or self-pitying thoughts that make you feel worthless or hopeless. Epictetus argues that remembering life's fragility actually prevents this kind of thinking.
Modern Usage:
This is what we call 'spiraling' or getting stuck in negative thought patterns that make everything seem hopeless.
Covet
To desperately want something that belongs to someone else, or to want something so badly it consumes your thoughts. Epictetus warns against this kind of desperate desire.
Modern Usage:
We see this in social media envy, keeping up with the Joneses, or obsessing over things we can't afford.
Stoic Perspective
The philosophical approach of accepting what you cannot control while focusing your energy on what you can control. This creates inner peace and practical wisdom.
Modern Usage:
This shows up in modern therapy approaches like CBT and in phrases like 'it is what it is' or 'focus on what you can change.'
Roman Slavery
The brutal system where people were owned as property, which Epictetus experienced firsthand. Slaves could be educated (like Epictetus) but had no control over their circumstances.
Modern Usage:
While we don't have legal slavery, many people feel trapped by circumstances beyond their control - debt, bad jobs, or family obligations.
Characters in This Chapter
Epictetus
Philosopher-teacher
Speaking from experience as a former slave who became disabled, he teaches that accepting life's harsh realities actually leads to freedom and better choices.
Modern Equivalent:
The wise mentor who's been through real hardship
Key Quotes & Analysis
"Let death and exile, and all other things which appear terrible, be daily before your eyes, but death chiefly"
Context: Opening advice on how to live with proper perspective
This isn't about being morbid - it's about using mortality as a reality check. When you remember that time is limited, you stop wasting it on things that don't matter.
In Today's Words:
Remember every day that life doesn't last forever, and neither do the things you think are permanent.
"You will never entertain an abject thought, nor too eagerly covet anything"
Context: Explaining the benefits of keeping mortality in mind
Remembering death prevents both self-pity and desperate wanting. You can't feel sorry for yourself or obsess over material things when you understand life's bigger picture.
In Today's Words:
You won't get stuck feeling sorry for yourself or desperately chasing things that don't really matter.
Thematic Threads
Perspective
In This Chapter
Keeping death in mind creates mental clarity and better priorities
Development
Builds on earlier themes of focusing only on what you can control
In Your Life:
You might notice how health scares or job losses suddenly make relationship problems seem less important
Class
In This Chapter
Working people often can't afford the luxury of ignoring life's fragility
Development
Continues exploration of how economic reality shapes philosophical outlook
In Your Life:
You might recognize how financial insecurity actually teaches valuable lessons about what matters
Freedom
In This Chapter
Accepting limitations paradoxically creates more freedom in daily choices
Development
Expands on earlier ideas about finding freedom through acceptance rather than control
In Your Life:
You might find that accepting your job's limitations helps you make better decisions within those constraints
Time
In This Chapter
Limited time forces better decision-making and priority-setting
Development
Introduced here as a key factor in living wisely
In Your Life:
You might notice how deadline pressure at work actually helps you focus on essential tasks
Realism
In This Chapter
Facing hard truths about mortality leads to clearer thinking
Development
Builds on Stoic emphasis on seeing things as they really are
In Your Life:
You might recognize how denying problems at work or home only makes them worse
You now have the context. Time to form your own thoughts.
Discussion Questions
- 1
What does Epictetus mean when he says to keep 'terrible things' in your daily thoughts, and why isn't this just being negative?
analysis • surface - 2
Why does remembering death and loss actually help people make better choices instead of paralyzing them with fear?
analysis • medium - 3
Think about healthcare workers, parents with sick children, or people who've faced job loss - where do you see this pattern of crisis bringing clarity in real life?
application • medium - 4
If you knew this was your last year at your current job or in your current living situation, what would you stop worrying about and what would you finally address?
application • deep - 5
What does this chapter reveal about why humans often need reminders of mortality to live well, and what does that say about how our minds work?
reflection • deep
Critical Thinking Exercise
The Last Year Exercise
Imagine you knew with certainty that you had exactly one more year in your current life situation - same job, same relationships, same health, same responsibilities. Write down what you're currently worrying about or spending mental energy on. Then rewrite that list, crossing out what you'd stop caring about and highlighting what you'd finally take action on. Notice how this perspective shift changes your priorities.
Consider:
- •Don't focus on dramatic changes - look for small shifts in daily choices and energy allocation
- •Pay attention to which worries disappear completely versus which ones become more urgent
- •Consider what conversations you've been avoiding or what boundaries you've been afraid to set
Journaling Prompt
Write about a time when you gained sudden clarity about what mattered - maybe during illness, job loss, or another major life change. What did you stop caring about, and what became crystal clear as important? How can you access that clarity now without waiting for crisis?
Coming Up Next...
Chapter 22: Handling the Haters
The coming pages reveal to prepare for criticism when you're trying to improve yourself, and teach us staying humble while staying committed is crucial for growth. These discoveries help us navigate similar situations in our own lives.